Celebrate National Hamburger Month With a White Castle Scented Candle!

Apparently there is a month for everything.  Did you know May is National Hamburger Month? White Castle is celebrating by selling a candle that smells of it’s meaty, oniony goodness.  NOM NOM NOM!

So, now you can torture your dog and make yourself hungry just by lighting a candle.

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All Sorts of Wrong: The Shake Weight for Men

I don’t think I need to go into any further information.  The picture is worth a thousand words.  However, to view the disturbing Shake Weight for Men commercial, do so after the jump.  Warning: If you’re heterosexual, it may turn you gay.

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Overpriced 3D Movie Tickets About to Get More Overpriced

If you didn’t feel like you were getting bent over by movie theaters enough with the higher cost of 3D movies, get ready to grab your ankles.

Regal Entertainment Group, Cinemark Holdings and AMC Entertainment will push 3D ticket prices higher, starting this weekend.  Hopefully this will burst the 3D gimmick bubble and we can get back to viewing movies without the migraines.
According to the Wall Street Journal:

So, not only are 3D prices being hiked up, IMAX prices will sky rocket also.  All this solidifies my intent on buying the largest LED-LCD TV I can find and enjoy standard non-migraine inducing flicks at home without feeling violated by the Movie Industry.

[Source: Slashfilm, The Wall Street Journal]

Cow Abducted by UFO?


This is a photo of a cow alledgedly being sucked through the air up to a UFO.  Yes.  A cow.

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California is Going DOOOOOWWWWNNNN! 5 Minute Clip from 2012

Check out this ridiculous clip from Roland Emmerich‘s Disaster Porn flick, 2012. John Cusack & Co outrun a giant earthquake in a Limo!!

This could be brainless fun in the theater. Matinee for sure.

Plot Synopsis for 2012:

Disaster movie maven Roland Emmerich (Independence Day, The Day After Tomorrow) crafts this apocalyptic sci-fi thriller following an academic researcher who opens a portal into a parallel universe, making contact with his double in an effort to prevent the catastrophic prophecies of the ancient Mayan calendar from coming to pass. According to the Mayan calendar, the world will come to an end on December 21, 2012.

When a global cataclysm thrusts the world into chaos, divorced writer and father Jackson Curtis (John Cusack) uses his knowledge of the ancient prophecies to ensure that the human race is not completely wiped out. Chiwetel Ejiofor, Danny Glover, Amanda Peet, Thandie Newton, and Oliver Platt round out the cast of this end-of-the-world thriller co-scripted by the director and his 10,000 B.C. writer/composer, Harald Kloser

Apple Store Robbed in 31 Seconds

How to rob an Apple Store.

1) Find a couple large bricks.

2) Wear a mask.

3) Peer through the large glass windows (made of Safety Glass) at the front of the store to locate Security Guard.

4) Wait until the over-weight Security Guard goes to the back of the store.

5) Throw brick through the Safety Glass window of front door and quickly grab all easily accessable laptops from the tables.

6) Run away from the over-weight Security Guard with your plunder.

*The Geek Couch does not actively endorse the theft of Apple Stores, but does think that Apple needs to step of the security of each store, and maybe get rid of it’s glass store fronts.

Sign of the Apocalypse #247: The Poll Dancing Doll


Christmas is coming up fast, and what better gift for your aspiring slut/stripper-in-training than this cute Pole Dancing Doll?!

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Idiot Kid Drinks Gas to Become a Transformer


Are people getting dumber? Are parents involved in their kids’ lives at all anymore?

I bring up these questions because some kid in China started drinking gasoline 5 years ago when he was 9 so we would become more like a Transformer.  He was inspired to do so after viewing the Transformers cartoon series.

The youngster was so impressed that he began drinking fuel on a daily basis to “obtain energy” and become a mighty warrior like the Transformers. [Russia Today]

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WTF? Introducing iBum. World’s First Photocopier Chair?


This is where you wonder if the Human Race has lost it.  Tomomi Sayuda has designed the iBum.  A chair that photocopies your ass, unknowingly.

I’ll let him explain himself:

“The arse is the window of the soul.”

I believe that human buttocks are one of the less discussed and focused part of human body. In this “iBum” project, I would like to reveal the visual of this less popular part of body without notice. The chair reveal human unconsciousness and reality. When audience sit down on the chair, a scanner on the top of chair start to scan people`s buttocks automatically.  Then the scanned image is printed out from the right hand side of the chair. A sensor is detecting people`s existence all the time. So people will not realize the existence of the scanner. Without notice, the photocopy of the bum will arrive next to the chair.

Hate to burst your bubble, Tomomi Sayuda, but I highly doubt we’ll be seeing the iBum anytime soon.  People with “photocopy ass” fetishes are a very small percentage of the population.

[Source: Gizmodo]

Urine to the Rescue! Solving the Energy Crisis.


Urine-powered cars, homes and personal electronic devices could be available in six months with new technology developed by scientists from Ohio University. [Discovery]

This is shocking to me.  First, I’m hearing about astronauts purifying urine to make drinking water.  Now, our pee can potentially help solve the current energy crisis.  Amazing.

Using a nickel-based electrode, the scientists can create large amounts of cheap hydrogen from urine that could be burned or used in fuel cells. “One cow can provide enough energy to supply hot water for 19 houses,” said Gerardine Botte, a professor at Ohio University developing the technology. “Soldiers in the field could carry their own fuel.” [Discovery]

[Source: Gizmodo, Discovery]